Do you want to make building furniture as complicated and hard as possible? Do you ever look at a nail sticking out of the drywall at the gallery you work at and wish, like really wish, that when you took it out it made a massive golf-ball sized hole instead of a pinhole? Well, do I have the solution for you!
Growing up we moved around PA a lot, and typically I would get put in charge (or take charge) of building small pieces of furniture. One of my hobbies, besides label making, is putting together IKEA furniture. It’s one of the most frustrating things imaginable, it’s horrible, I love it.
I especially love making it as hard as possible by doing things such as, using scissors or a butterknife instead of a screwdriver, not reading instructions all the way through, and even things such as, misplacing that one nail that really seems like it’s integral to the furniture’s ability to stand up-right but it’s somehow standing up-right anyways so maybe it doesn’t matter! Just ignore how much it wobbles if you try to use it, that’s part of the design maybe.
So you could imagine, I’m not too good or familiar with using actual tools as a result. And why would I be? Using scissors as the multitool I know it wants to be is super effective at least half the time.
Unfortunately, mournfully, put a nail in my coffin- scissors only seem to work on screws. I cannot, no matter how many times I try, use scissors to get nails out of walls without slicing my fingers open. I wish there was a tool for this specific purpose…
And before you say “hammer,” don’t.
I genuinely believe I would be better at using a hammer if I was blindfolded and turned into a lizard.
And you’ll never guess what 25% of my job entails.
The need to use a hammer correctly.
I cannot tell you how many holes I’ve turned from little pinpricks to borderline cave ins.
Last year.
I’m better at it this year and now here I am about to show you how to not destroy the walls at the gallery you work at.
And because I’m extremely bored, here’s a step by step example of what not to do versus what to do in comic format.
Now obviously you absolutely can use a hammer without ripping out half the wall, this is a skill issue. I, obviously, cannot use a hammer, and using pliers is just easiest for me.
There are other ways to get nails out as well, and several helpful YouTube channels dedicated to making sure you don’t get fired from your gallery job because you damaged the structural integrity of the building. Placing a book, or a sponge, or something softer under the nail will also help to protect your walls.
I hope everyone’s having a great summer so far and staying far, far away from IKEA manuals.
~Ana