When you are scheduled to display your artwork in two days but are completely unprepared, follow these steps:
2. Laugh it off. You’ve got two days.
3. Go about your daily routine and ignore the impending deadline.
4. If you don’t think about it, it doesn’t exist.
5. Tell yourself you’re going to stay up all night to make art for the show.
6. Fall asleep.
7. Wake up and cry.
9. Throw paint at fabric at 3am (“art”).
10. Hang up “art” at venue at 4am.
11. Fall asleep and sleep all day, including through the evening when people are showing up to look at your work.
13. Laugh it off.
14. Sell one piece for $15.
15. Get ready for the next show.
This has been an accurate account of my most recent art show.