Early November Scrooge arrived
To try to destroy December.
I said no way like Frankie’s way
And had a Merry Christmas
December 25, 2020, Christmas. Silent. Peaceful.
I wake to the tune of Glow by Brett Eldredge playing in my head. Again. Ugh….maybe. You see, I once read that sometimes God tells us His will via our Internal Radio Dial or IRD. Frankly, He uses it a lot for me and for the most part I’m okay with that but lately, the Dude has been playing Glow like crazy mad, and I couldn’t be happier as it’s been the same line over and over. God loves to watch me glow.
As the day went on, it was quiet and nice. No tension, no stress, and no sight of Scrooge. I was very happy. But as the day went on, I got sadder and sadder when I realized there would be no Christmas this year. I could really feel my inner child suffer and knew I had to love her through this pain. I decided a little art therapy could help her regain that holiday cheer by doing a painting.
I took out an old ornament painting I did with a former friend and decided to paint over it due to too many painful memories. And to help me let go of past, painful Christmas’s. You see, there really is a Scrooge in my life; he announced early in November that there would be no Christmas this year. I did not want to believe it. Turns out, I was wrong. There were no gifts, no stockings hung, and not even cards were exchanged. It made me cry late that night and I let the pain out as I prepped the canvas with gesso.
I felt the urge to paint a wood background with three planks of wood in grey and white hues. Three for the past, present, and future Christmas’.
I thought about past Christmas’s and what made them special. I had laughs with people who loved me. Through the holiday season I swapped gifts with friends, and exchanged cards with people from my Facebook book group. I realized in this present Christmas that I did have laughs with people who love me that morning on the phone. I did get to swap gifts with friends throughout the month. I got a ton of cards with my Facebook book group. Even more, I was given the gift of a peaceful, quiet day where I didn’t have to interact with Scrooge as he stayed in bed all day. I had cat cuddles and eggnog and wore new fuzzy socks. I was blessed with all these gifts and they arrived not under my tree but in other ways. Then I thought about what my future Christmas’ would be like. I know they would be filled with love, laughter, joy, and many other countless blessings. Who knows, maybe I’ll finally have my happily ever after.
I thought of all this while painting and my inner child felt loved. She smiled and decided to paint a playful wreath in blue. She added a fun red and silver bow, with red glitter too.
After completing this art therapy I decided to break out my books to look at the meaning behind the symbols I choose and why my soul felt the need to paint a blue and silver wreath on a wood background.
Wreaths symbolize the circle of life, the divine, for honor and grace.
Blue symbolizes a connection to heaven, represents the throat chakra and helps the person feel safe to speak up.
Red ribbons were used for protection from evil.
Silver is a mirror of the soul, it helps us to see ourselves as God sees us, it represents hope, love, and kindness.
Three can also represent the Trinity, spirit-mind-body, and male-female-child.
It is no wonder my inner child chose a blue wreath to process and heal from Scrooge trying to destroy my Christmas Day. This expressive art technique really helped me feel, heal, and love myself again.
I was able to radiate joy once more. And just like in the song, I became like sunshine on a field of snow; after all, God really likes to watch me glow.